Strangest Wish Products REVIEWED - Part 2

Wish dot com is the online marketplace where you can buy just about anything. The main draw of the site is that you can buy quirky, ridiculous items for super low prices, but you get what you pay for. In part 1 of this series, I found that out the hard way, from $4 medicine balls made from mystery materials to $2 terrible resin teeth.

I went back to Wish.com and ordered even more of the craziest stuff I could find so that you don’t have to waste your money figuring out if it’s any good! Let’s see if any of it holds up or kills me, whichever comes first!

Confusing Earrings

I typed the word ‘weird’ in Wish and the results came up with a super weird product. I assume that they are earrings because the word ‘earring’ is used 4 times in the product title. It's not clear if it's designed to look like fleshy, dangling human feet, or stud ears. But for $4, it was a horrifying bargain.

So, I hit buy on the dangling feet version, and a mere 3 weeks later a surprisingly small package arrived at my door. At first, I thought it was something else I’d ordered but no. I got a pair of remarkably tiny, metal studs of ears.

Did my order get mixed up? I checked the description back to make sure I wasn’t having a stroke, and I honestly don’t think this seller has any idea what they’re selling.

The description says that the earrings are "gold" and that their style is a "travel souvenir." And they say it’s applicable to gift them as employee benefits! Considering how confusing this seller’s description is, I’m surprised I got anything at all.

Verdict: do not buy these for your employees.

Lobster Slippers

In part 1, I bought some fish slippers that I tried and failed to fit on my massive feet. Well, it takes more than one bad slipper experience to deter me, because I found lobster slippers!

I wasn’t too sure about this, because despite saying they’re for ‘men and women’ in the product title, the majority of the sizes said ‘children’ next to them. But then I saw a few larger sizes for adults, so I ordered the largest size they had available.

It was only after I’d spent $20 on these things that I looked at the seller’s name, which was "sjcjksfhskshfhjas." That name made of keyboard mash of letters didn't give me much confidence and I thought this purchase was probably a mistake.

But when my lobsters finally arrived, they looked pretty much like the pictures! Then I tried to put them on and was disappointed again. I know I have big feet, but these are surely kids' sliders.

Verdict: crustation frustration.

Chicken Cushion

I love a good novelty cushion, so when I stumbled across a listing selling giant, delicious-looking chicken shaped pillows, I nearly threw my credit card at the screen. I was hungry and sleepy just looking at them!

So, I checked all the measurements, and decided to order a number 2 and a number 10, promising me two 70 cm chicken leg pillows, about 27 inches long each. That’s one big chicken, and for $40 all up it had better be good.

But what I received was a complete disappointment. They both arrived barely 20cm long, barely the same length as my hand! What comfort are these meant to provide my behind? They’re barely enough to support one cheek!

The listing's product photos show a lady having a lovely nap on her promised pillows, but I can’t even fit my elbow on the ones they delivered!

Verdict: KFD - Kentucky Fried Disappointment.

Hermit Hell

A little while ago, I was on Etsy when I came across the abomination of a product. A handmade, creepy, realistic finger-hermit crab ornament for over US$120, perfect for the horror lover in your life.

I did my best to forget all about this until, as I was browsing through Wish, I found the same product, using identical images from Etsy while trying to pass them off as their own.

But this hideous hermit crab was only listed at $10. The description even reads “each one is hand painted and finished to great realism”. Obviously, I had to see if what Wish delivered lived up to the clearly stolen photo promises and, somehow, they made this thing worse!

The cheap material makes it look more like some cheap sausages sticking out of a stale croissant! The bad paint job leaves it looking more tacky than scary, there’s no way this thing has ever seen a human hand, let alone been hand-painted.

Verdict: the only realism here is real disappointment.

Super Scissors

Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I assumed all scissors just had 1 set of blades, one attached to each handle. However, from Wish I’ve learned Herb scissors exist, like normal scissors, but with 5 sets of blades instead of 1. More slice for the price!

Obviously, I wanted to see how effective all those blades would be, so I ordered a pair of the 19 cm, some 7 ½-inches-long, super scissors for $12. What I received instead however, was a child-sized set of scissors with only 3 sets of blades on them.

I could barely fit my massive hands in the holes! But, when I tested them on a piece of cardboard, they cut pretty well. I’m just not sure I have any child sized herbs they’ll be useful for cutting, at least, no more than a regular pair of scissors!

Verdict: I guess it is a small world after all.

Boo-Tea

I love a good, well brewed cup of tea and poop jokes, not together though. However, I found a butt and poop themed tea strainer in Wish. Human ingenuity will never cease to amaze me. So obviously, I bought it.

As promised in the description, the entire thing is made of silicone. The butt slips onto the lip of the mug, while the poop strainer is suspended below it in the water, diffusing the tea placed inside it.

For what it’s worth, the strainer did do a decent job of diffusing the tea. The only problem was when I went to remove the strainer, it looked like I was plucking a big shiny turd out of my mug.

Verdict: Tasty.

Slime to Shine

Slime is such a weirdly satisfying thing, and if it’s the right consistency it can actually be useful too, according to Wish. The glue base that makes up the slime can stick to small debris like dust, and because it’s super malleable it can get into hard-to-reach places!

Plus, Wish claim’s their slime "doesn’t stick to your hands while sticking gray" and also that it can "clean a lot of digital water that is afraid of water", whatever that means. To figure out what this product actually is, I bought 3 of them.

For $10, I was expecting more than palm sized pots. I put it to the test against some soil on a plate, just so we could see how much muck it really picked up. It did ok; it got the majority of the mess, but it takes a lot of rolling around to really get it all up.

The only issue was once it was soiled, the slime itself was impossible to clean, and so it ended up in the trash after just one use!

Verdict: one non-recyclable slimy waste.

Face Reveal

I’m not a fan of showing my face on social media. I wear hoods, facemasks, dark glasses but thanks to Wish, there’s now a product that does it all: the full-face visor! Promising a weirdly featureless visage that reflects absolutely everything, like a big fisheye mirror attached to your face, I ordered one for a respectable $7.

After a few weeks, it arrived with all the components detached, the arms and nose bridge needed to be clipped in. I was really surprised by how lightweight, colorful, and reflective it was, as you can see by the full view of my humble recording setup being reflected! The visor is pretty cool!

Verdict: four thumbs up from me!

Ear We Go

If there’s one thing you shouldn’t buy from Wish, it’s tech that looks too good to be true! Multiple investigations have found counterfeit, illegal, and unsafe products prone to catching fire sold all over the site.

Which is why, when I came across a super tiny 1080p camera designed to go inside your body for just $3, I had to get it. Good quality endoscopy cameras are usually about $50, so one for $3 just sounds hella dangerous.

The camera arrived looking vastly different to the pictures on the website. It was significantly smaller to the picture shown on the product listing and resembled more of a small straw than a camera.

But after plugging it into my phone, the six tiny LEDs on the end lit up, the camera connected, and I decided to go on a bit of a tour of my bod! I definitely did not feel comfortable shoving this thing too far into my ear, as it’s pretty difficult to gauge just how far in it’s getting and there is nothing attached to stop it going too far!

But what about the footage it captured? Check below:

You can see a lot of hair. At least, I think it’s hair. The 1080p quality seems to be missing the 10 as it looks like I filmed this on a toaster! However, for $3, I’m kinda surprised it worked at all!

Verdict: not bad for a light up straw!

Sus Camera

The last time I bought a spy camera from Wish for part 1, it didn’t end well. Did I learn my lesson? Absolutely not.

Instead, while I was scrolling through the site, a $5 Spy Pen cropped up, promising both video and audio recording all inside a super covert looking pen. Obviously, wanting to live out my James Bond fantasy, I wasted no time hitting that buy button! But when it arrived, I was underwhelmed.

Despite looking like something James Bond might use in the pictures, it felt more Johnny English! Made entirely of plastic, it was super thick, felt horrible, and was difficult to unscrew, but it did contain a microSD card slot and a charging port.

So, I put my own microSD card in and charged it for a good hour or so. While I was waiting, I tested out the pen portion on my instruction manual, which was entirely in Chinese, just in case someone were to call me out on using this overtly thick pen for surveillance.

The retractable rollerball nib did work! Shame the same couldn’t be said for the actual camera though. I did everything the product description told me to, and no matter how many times I tried, the microSD card captured nothing. No video, no audio, nothing at all!

Confused, I took another look at the product description, and realized that maybe the problem wasn’t me, but the pen, because this thing only works on a Microsoft 1998, 2000, XP or Vista system! Those are so old they’re not even supported by Microsoft anymore! I give up.

Verdict: disappointed, but, yet again, not surprised!

Manly Manicure

While a lot of the products you’ll see scrolling through Wish look pretty intuitive, there are some that you might need a hand understanding, especially a realistic nail art training hand on a bendable mount, designed to help nail technicians practice their craft without ruining their clients' nails.

Some models can look more realistic than others, and I chose one priced a whopping $60! Obviously, I decided to shell out to see how realistic it was. I ordered a right-hand number 6, but what I got was not similar to the product advertised. Whose skin color is this meant to be representing? The pink panther?

Nevertheless, I unpacked it, clamped it to the table, gave it a quick high five test, and began my venture into a backup career path! I painted the cuticle area but forgot to put fake nails onto the fingers.

Sadly, the main mount of this thing has the structural integrity of custard, and flops over at the slightest touch. There’s also nothing in the wrist section, and it folds over if you so much as look at it funny. So, it was polish on bare nail beds or nothing.

Verdict: if you see one of these in your local salon, RUN.

Mini Manly Manicure

Wish will suggest you products based on stuff you’ve already looked at. And because I’d made the mistake of buying the manicure hand, I got suggested some fake finger models, for practicing nail art.

I bought 5 for $3 just to see if they’d be as bad as the hand and actually, they somewhat surprised me. Unlike the hand, they arrived the same color and style I’d ordered, and were all pretty uniform. Definitely more realistic than the hand!

I applied nail polish on them, and they came out gorgeous. Despite being creepy, these are 100 times better than the hand. Plus, you can reuse them as Halloween decorations!

Verdict: fantastic fake fingers!

Porcelain Glow

Sometimes I think I should be smarter with my money and buy only the essentials. But about 10 seconds after that resolution, I’ll get distracted by something like a motion activated, color changing toilet bowl light. Do I need my toilet to look like a portal to another dimension? No. For $4, do I want to? More than life itself.

Like most Wish items, it arrived after several weeks, and looked almost exactly like the pictures described: one long arm with a bendable wire light to hook onto the toilet bowl, connected to a motion sensor and battery pack. I clipped it on to the nearest toilet I could find, turned it on, flipped off the lights and it’s perfect! Portal potty success!

Looks a bit weird when you sit on it in the dark though. It kind of feels like I’m about to send a poop into another dimension! But for $4, this little light does exactly what it says on the website.

Verdict: flush. Sorry, flashy!

Green Suits Me

When you go to a costume party, you want to go as something people recognize like a pirate, or superhero, or, if you shop on Wish, a big inflatable green man. Not entirely sure what the reference I’m clearly missing here is, but it’s time to get in the party spirit by buying a green blimp costume for $60!

After a few weeks, the suit arrived complete with a hood, gloves, socks, and a cheap plastic attachable fan. The material felt like an active fire hazard, and it wasn’t what I’d consider $60 worth of costume, but I decided to try it on, albeit away from any open flames.

I tried my best to avoid turning this into a Hindenburg re-enactment! The socks even fit on my massive feet, no problems with the gloves either; finally, clothing items from Wish that actually fit me. All that was left to do was to insert the fan in the side hole, and then hit the on button. Here's the result:

As long as the fan is in place and set to on, this thing doesn’t deflate, no matter what position you’re in!

Verdict: worth all the green!

Intruder Alert!

Most people are scared of intruders breaking into their homes but professional home security systems don’t come cheap, unless you’re looking on Wish!

Advertised as an Infrared Burglar Alarm System, this thing had no description attached to it whatsoever, just a few images of two big egg like things seemingly sending an infrared beam to one another, which somehow catches a burglar.

It also claims in the images that the eggs are anti-rain, anti-fog, anti-dust, and anti-worm, though I don't know what worms have anything to do with home security. But I was about to find out, for a suspiciously cheap $8.

It turns out I was right to have my reservations. I received a box with the two infra-red eggs in it, and a relatively confusing user’s guide, but they didn’t come with any way to power them. No battery compartment, no wires, nothing!

The circuitry inside the eggs seemed like it might have worked, but aside from some screws and, inexplicably, two black elastics it came with, there was nothing.

A look back at the review section showed a lot of other people had, like me, bought their eggs assuming they’d come with a way to power them, like most tech does. Well, that’s what I get for not looking at the reviews first!

Verdict: looks like I’m getting robbed tonight.

Give it the Finger

Do you, like me, have feeble fingers? Scrawny forearms? Weak wrists? This is not a question I ever thought I’d find myself asking, but because Wish offers a weirdly “Hand Grip Finger Strength Exercise Gripper Forearm Health Builder Strength Finger Grip Arm Muscle Builder Wrist Trainer,” I had to ask.

For only $2, it's time to get my little lower arms super jacked! It arrived looking, and feeling, like an overly complicated elastic band. But I put it on anyway and got to training.

You can definitely feel it doing something in your hand, the only problem is that if you need to use said hand for something quickly, it’s fiddly to take off and put on again. For me, it’s a little more hassle than it’s worth, but for $2, I’m not mad at it.

Verdict: my wrists remain limp for another day!

Juicy Juicy Melons

Is there anything more refreshing in the summertime than a slice of watermelon? Well according to Wish, there is! And all you need to do is turn your watermelon into its own keg and for $4 I had to put it to the test.

When it arrived, I was shocked, because contrary to most Wish products, I recognized the brand: PROfreshonals. These guys do a range of cooking utensils. Was Wish mimicking their entire brand to sell knock offs? Honestly, I don’t think they were as the construction of all the components here was really sturdy.

So, I decided to follow the instructions and hollow out my melon. Once a husk of the fruit it once was, I then screwed in the three red knobs so it could stand on its own and pierced it with the tap. I had to place the tap towards the bottom so that all the juice would flow out, but the tap itself was huge! Way bigger than my miniscule melon!

Nevertheless, I persevered, and soon had a fully constructed watermelon tap! Then it was time to blend up my melon pulp, pour it back in, and let her rip! A whole half a cup of slightly warm watermelon juice.

Verdict: This might actually be the genuine product and not a fake.

Finger Fail

I love a good magic trick, and if you do too, then stay away from this next Wish product! I was reeled in by the promise of having my fingers look like they were on fire so I bought them for a whole $5.

The packaging for this was my favorite part of the entire product, purely for the messages on the back which reassured me ‘each item is the result of efforts and wisdom’, and that they wish me ‘a bright performer’. Bad English straight-out of the gate, you love to see it.

The instruction manual was in Chinese, unsurprisingly. Well, it’s only strapping tiny flammable devices to my hand, how dangerous can it possibly be?

After sliding what looked like a few wicks attached to metal guard plates onto the tops of my fingers, which kept sliding off because the fit was really loose, I applied some commonsense and decided against lighting them.

This product is insanely dangerous. The design quality is poor, they fall off at the slightest rotation, and to add the cherry on top, they don’t even work! The wick these things come with doesn’t burn, it just smolders and smells faintly of plastic!

Verdict: you’re fired.

You Care, Eye Care

After my last trip to the optometrist, my eye doctor gave me some hints for good eye care, like not wearing my contact lenses for too long and taking breaks from screen use. However, she didn’t tell me to buy an ‘Electric Eye Care Massager’ from Wish for $10, and yet, now I own one because I am all about eye care.

These things do not feel good on first impressions. They’re made of ‌cheap, plastic material that I do not want to put on my face. But this one’s for you guys, so I put some batteries in it, hit the on button.

This thing gives entirely random vibrational pulses. Somehow, it’s making my teeth chatter while it’s massaging my nose and cheeks, literally anywhere except my eye region! I’m more stressed in this thing than I was before I put it on!

Verdict: I suggest rebranding this as a nose massager!

Creepy Ear Candle

I have a pretty gross confession to make: I get real nasty earwax build ups. Why do you think I was so keen to get the ear-camera? It’s caused me problems from time to time, but no matter how bad it’s gotten, I’ve never considered putting a wax coated tube in my ear and setting it on fire. But thanks to Wish, this is now an option!

Technically, this is a practice called ear candling, a treatment that’s been credited with everything from removing earwax to curing cancer. It works by lighting one end of the candle, placing the other end in the ear canal and the rest is unclear.

Multiple scientific studies have proved there is literally no benefit to using one of these. They don’t do anything, aside from pose an immediate fire risk to the side of your head! So, when I saw the description of this Wish product promising that this ear candle could alleviate chronic headaches, allergies, vertigo, and remove my earwax, all for $5, I had to test it out!

I certainly got a lot of orange tubes for my buck! The description said these were made of ‘wax’ and the wonderfully vague ‘natural material’. They felt very hard, and solid, but I assumed that must be the wax.

So, imagine my surprise when my friend helped me put this thing in my ear, lit it, and then the undeniable smell of burning plastic filled the room! That was probably the point we should have stopped, but it wasn’t until smoke started coming out of the end and I felt something fall into my ear that we decided this was definitely not going to end well!

Verdict: who knew lighting naked flames fueled by plastic near your face was a bad idea?

If you were amazed by these weird Wish products, you might want to read part 1 of this series. Thanks for reading!